Am I crashing or am i flying?
Am I an ocean or a fleeting flame?
The air feels so cold and the ground so warm
The water so dry and the grass has been crying
I’m rooted to the sky and the moon is my soil
I’m falling from the ground, I’m so upside down
What am I?
I can’t do it anymore
can’t feel my heart
can’t hear my screams
as my skin tears apart.
can’t taste the pills they shove down my throat
can’t find another place to go
I can’t say goodbye
can’t stop my hands
can’t stop the pain inside
I can’t live.
but i know not a single soul cares…
Hey, so i know this isn’t a site like yahoo or reddit, but I really need some advice. So, my mom has been acting really transphobic lately. We’ve been having arguments, tried to talk seriously, and nothings working. The most recent problem is my hair. It’s a pixie with long bangs (as seen in picture) and my mom refused to cut it shorter when she cut it a month ago. So, yesterday i asked her if we could cut it shorter, or if she wanted me to do it. But she flipped out and said no. I really want this, and i even relapsed with cutting. (Yes, i’m going to tell my therapist) and when i told my mom, she just yelled at me and said i was stupid. I don’t know why, but my hair is the only reason i don’t pass as a guy. What should i do? there’s no possible way to style it that looks short or good. What options do i have? I guess i should just do it, but i’m afraid of what she’ll do. She most likely won’t hit me, but i’m a wuss. Also, anxiety man. Please help.
broken desire, shattered attire
wear that crown of thorns
glass tears and eyes of fire
times like these are in dire
need of fixing
come and help me
and broken everything
I tell you of my differences
that i am not what i seem
i wipe off all my makeup
and throw away my frilly things
cut my hair and put on a hood
oh my goodness, i feel so good.
you don’t like it, and i’m offending you?
you say this isn’t something i should choose.
you say i’ll never be the same
and i’m taking your “precious” daughter away.
you say “i’m losing you”
“You’re not my kid anymore”
you know, when i hit a certain age
i’m walking out that door
so i put on my makeup
and throw on a gown
you know that I will never be happy
but do you love your “precious” daughter now?
you throw off society
and pull on yourself
you’re tired of fitting in
and paining yourself
you look in the mirror
as your new self unfurls
and you smile at how
you just changed your whole world
I am so excited you guys! I am finally going to stop trying to fit in to social norms, and I’m going to start being a boy again. I’ll start binding again, stop wearing makeup, and just be happy again. I just wanted to share my excitement with you guys. (yes i have a pimple on my chin.)