Yet another video :)

I have made another video. This time i talk about the elements to converting to Islam, and my battle against an eating disorder that i overcame with the help of my family and Allah. (I did cry a little but i edited most of it out.) I would really appreciate and love you guys if you’d watch my video and like, comment, subscribe. Let me know what you want to hear next. Thank you! 🙂

Confession

hey guys. I need to say something. I may seem happy and just a morbid poem writer. But really i am a suicidal transgender teenager who just lost everything in his/her life that made them happy. the only reason i’m alive is my best friend, and i’m still on the edge. I can’t stop cutting, and i’ve been caught popping pills. I’ve been to 3 mental hospitals in a 3 year interval. I cry myself to sleep. i listen to music to get away.  My dad hung up on me in the mental hospital in october and practically said his girflfriend was more important to him. I decided i need to come clean and show my scars/cuts. Some are old some are new.IMG_20151215_211820.jpgIMG_20151215_211609.jpgIMG_20151215_211634.jpgIMG_20151215_211657.jpgIMG_20151215_211711.jpg

Question needs answering…

Question needs answering…

Hey, so i know this isn’t a site like yahoo or reddit, but I really need some advice. So, my mom has been acting really transphobic lately. We’ve been having arguments, tried to talk seriously, and nothings working. The most recent problem is my hair. It’s a pixie with long bangs (as seen in picture) and my mom refused to cut it shorter when she cut it a month ago. So, yesterday i asked her if we could cut it shorter, or if she wanted me to do it. But she flipped out and said no. I really want this, and i even relapsed with cutting. (Yes, i’m going to tell my therapist) and when i told my mom, she just yelled at me and said i was stupid. I don’t know why, but my hair is the only reason i don’t pass as a guy. What should i do? there’s no possible way to style it that looks short or good. What options do i have? I guess i should just do it, but i’m afraid of what she’ll do. She most likely won’t hit me, but i’m a wuss. Also, anxiety man. Please help.

How about now?

How about now?

I tell you of my differences

that i am not what i seem

i wipe off all my makeup

and throw away my frilly things

cut my hair and put on a hood

oh my goodness, i feel so good.

but wait.

you don’t like it, and i’m offending you?

you say this isn’t something i should choose.

you say i’ll never be the same

and i’m taking your “precious” daughter away.

you say “i’m losing you”

“You’re not my kid anymore”

you know, when i hit a certain age

i’m walking out that door

so i put on my makeup

and throw on a gown

you know that I will never be happy

but do you love your “precious” daughter now?

Excited

Excited

I am so excited you guys! I am finally going to stop trying to fit in to social norms, and I’m going to start being a boy again. I’ll start binding again, stop wearing makeup, and just be happy again. I just wanted to share my excitement with you guys. (yes i have a pimple on my chin.)